In process pic…new spirit girl soon to take her first breath.

spray inks : collage : stamps : acrylics : charcoal pencil

creating  ::  purging

finishing  ::  listening

dancing  ::  loving

we had our first meeting couple of weeks ago and i got assigned an accountability partner (woohoo! fanfare!)

nina and i met on sunday and we spent some time talking and chatting then…..3 hrs later (yikes!!)….remembered that we really needed to hash out our plan for holding each other accountable for the goals we’d each outlined for ourselves for 2012.  that took up a whole 20 minutes, then we went back to talking for another hour (by that time hubby was probably thinking bout sending out the calvalry).

so, even tho i have researched life coaches and their prices and know exactly who i want to use, in lieu of the expense of a really good one, i will work with my AP and move F O R W A R D on my own….for now at least.

yup….this girl has plans.

~~ in other news ~~

i’ve uploaded a new print to the shop. it’s from one of my fav paintings. go check it out.

my intention in choosing that word was to signify a change in direction…a change in mediums…a change in outlook.  i thought it was about the action of making & creating new, more fulfilling for me art…art that spoke from my soul instead of from just the tips of my fingers.

throughout the year i thought about my word C R E A T E and i have to tell you, it never completely gelled with what i had in my mind but still, i knew that that was the word i was meant to incorporate into my life for 2011.

these last few weeks, as I contemplated my new word for 2012 and pondered about the year that was drawing to a close, it suddenly dawned on me the real meaning of my word.   it was sitting there, all the while, waiting for me to discover its truth.

C R E A T E :: to bring something into existence

it was never about the actual act of creating a painting or stitching a journal

it was truly more about opening up my inner eye even wider and creating a space in my heart and in my mind for these things to happen.

it was about :

…shedding the old, the comfortable

…allowing the different to blossom

…finally, finally! letting go of that last bit of old rope i clung to

…giving myself permission to begin where i was

…trusting that this was what had to be

~ ~

breathe.

~ ~

as for 2012……i know i’ve stumbled upon the word for me when it starts jumping out at me whenever i read it on a sign or spy it in a sentence, just wanting to be noticed, taken in, savored….to then wiggle its toosh in a bit as it takes a seat in my heart and settles in for the long haul.

this word struck me right in the middle of my forehead when i came across it.

F O R W A R D

there is such a sense of calm

of sitting in my rightful space when i think about or say this word to myself.

so i shall move F O R W A RD and see what happiness develops.

~~

smile.

just keep on,

quietly and earnestly,

growing

through all that happens to you.

You cannot disrupt

this process

more violently

than by looking

outside yourself for answers

that may only be found

by attending

to your innermost feelings … “

- rainer maria rilke

~ ~ ~ ~  ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~~ ~ ~ ~

just something for me to remember as i walk this path that has chosen me

G

i totally agree.  which is why i choose to paint them.  women’s faces in particular intrigue me.

in her you can see and feel the strength, the tenacity, the resilience, the commitment, the glow, the empathetic listener, the dreamer, the seeker, the soother, the mother, the survivor.  i love all these things and more about who we are as women.

“Untapped Possibilities”

i was, however, so very scared of painting eyes because, you see, the eyes express everything, if you look close enough.  and my first attempts were…..ehhh…..

poor thing looks beyond scared

i tried a couple more times and then decided, instead of painting them open, i chose to show the spiritual side of women (my spirit girls) with eyes closed, almost in a meditative state, and loved how they were turning out.

but at some point i knew that i would have to venture down that path.  i’ve made a few more attempts recently and, with a little more practice, who knows…..my girls will either be life long soul searchers (eyes closed) or expressive seekers (eyes wide open).

and the story continues…

toodles all,

G

i’ve been trying to think of reasons why i am drawn to mixed media and painting in particular and, after some thought, this is what came to mind (plus a sprinkling of recent paintings)…

~  i feel at home with this medium…..i feel so comfortable and connected with acrylic paints and the papers i work with

~  i like that the result of any session in my studio is almost immediate gratification….whether 10 minutes or 2 hrs

~ i feel that my true self is being expressed…….especially thru my spirit girl paintings

~  i get to play AND get messy (i mean that literally…..all in the guise of work…ha!

toodles all,

G

i spent the the day with some of my favorite peeps. there was laughter and talking and eating and sitting in a space of contentment and friendship.

we hadn’t met, all of us, for some time…schedules. and family commitments and life interrupting….but today we came together and resolved to recommit to us, to the pandoras once again.

Today was ornament day at delane’s.   since Christmas is only a few weeks away, we each came with an ornament to share, bringing enough materials for each of us to make one ornament.

i was torn between two so brought both…both really easy to make.  for the first one you cut fabric {i used Onasburg fabric} into squares, spread glue all over and punched into a styroform ball.  love it!

susan working on her fabric ornament

rachel preparing her fabric

delane showcase her finished ornament…circles cut from scrapbook paper, folded in half, glued together and hung with a piece of ribbon….beautiful.

she glued and glittered all the edges and that just made the whole thing pop (not shown).

rachel’s ornament to share used string, glue and a balloon. we figured out that it takes a lot more time to dry than the directions prescribed so only a few of us got these finished.  here’s michele painting glue on her strung balloon.

and susan’s almost finished one, rolled in green glitter.  when the glue has dried you pop the balloon to remove it. we thought it would look real good with a few of them across a table or mantel with a battery operated light in the center or twinkle lights bunched up in its center.

we got such a kick out of her green glittered fingers….look at that gorgeous green colour!

i didn’t get to take a pic of any of delane’e ornament project….she bought clear glass ornaments, coated the inside with a small of amount of Pledge floor cleaner then tipped fine glitter into the opening coating all surfaces.

i worked on the project susan brought.  she needle felted some wool and roving, stuck in a dryer and brought the finished ball for us to stitch.  wool usually makes me crazy itchy but this one i had a ball stitching.

delane made a delicious chicken corn chowder soup for lunch with homemade bread and i enjoyed it so much i forgot to take a before pick but here’s the good-to-the-last-drop after shot…..hee hee.

we had special company while we worked….she played and talked and even slept a little.  it was rachel’s daughter {and delane’s grandaughter} kiyah.  what a sweetie she is!!!

toodles,

G

last weekend i caught a true glimpse of his transformation and it warmed the cuckolds of my heart like you wouldn’t believe.

i can finally breath and watch him bloom.

last thursday we got up early {uggh..6 am} to watch the airmen’s run. he ran by in flight formation……and i missed him. I was so excited and thought i had set the camera up correctly to get an action shot but was crying to much too see.  everyone else saw him and was shouting…’there he is, there he is’… .and for the life of me i didn’t see him.

days later as i rifled thru the 20 or so pics (i just kept clicking the camera button as they all ran by)  i saw i that i did get a shot…bit blurry yes, but i got a shot.

hours later we are sitting in bleachers {freezing our butts off} waiting for the new airmen to march in for the coin ceremony {i’ll post again about the significance of the airman coin, it’s a fascinating story}. In they march looking fine in their ‘blues’.

we were all cheering and shouting as his flight came in.  omg! he’s a handsome dude even if i say it myself.

when we actually got permission to greet them and hug them my niece took the camera from me…said she needed to capture the moment.

None of us had seen him for  2 months and here he was….finally.

i saw him, hugged him but just couldn’t get over it, remembering who we sent off to basic, this boy we’ve struggled with through the years and seeing this young man, all grown up, standing tall and in charge, in front of me.  i kept touching his face, looking up at him and crying all over again.

that sneaky niece of mine took quite a few pics of me blubbering on like this but i won’t subject you to all of them.  it was a fairly long scene to say the least. Ha!

So we’re standing there talking and laughing and joking and my mother, her head wrapped in a scarf cause the wind was so bitingly cold on her ears, asks him a question and he answers with a ‘yes ma’am’.

I have never seen my mother do this before but the woman just swooned into his arms. it’s not that he wasn’t ever respectful when speaking to her but the way he spoke, with that “military bearing’ he presented, just melted my mother’s heart and……she swooned.

no other word for it.

of course the niece captured the play by play moments again, but this was the best shot by far.

we got to hang with him on base the rest of the day.  he showed us around everywhere.  Lackland AFB is a large expanse of area, the largest of all the training bases in the US.   in one of the letters he wrote to us he said there were a few things that he was missing…

…being able to put his hands in his pockets

…a nice juicy steak

…and something sweet
{that boy man has a sweet tooth like you wouldn’t believe!!!}.

so we headed out to eat lunch and buy him a large vanilla milkshake that he savored till the absolute last drop. it was hard leaving him again but i knew we’d be back the next day for graduation.

toodles,

G

…as creatives

…as artists

…as seekers of beauty and light

….as writers of our own stories

…that we are worth the time.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

this video by jan phillips speaks this truth so eloquently

[There is a video that cannot be displayed in this feed. Visit the blog entry to see the video.]

toodles,

G